Back in March of 2018 I was itching... itching for the opportunity to connect with people. I had spent the last year and a half adjusting to my new role as a stay at home mom to a special needs child, in a state that I had only lived in for less than 2 years. To say this was extremely isolating and soul sucking would be an understatement. Yes, soul sucking sounds bad, but this is the best I can come up with to describe the emptiness and lack of direction I was feeling during that time.
At home, I was a special needs mom and a wife. While these both were very important roles that I did not take lightly, I still felt that hollowness. I want to emphasize that there is nothing wrong with being a mother and/or a wife, and while they can be rewarding, my sanity needed people. I craved the feeling of wanting to inspire and to be inspired. My passion in life has always been to try and help people feel seen and heard. My redundant routine under my roof diminished that fire greatly. I needed something, ANYTHING, to connect me to the world outside of my home. I needed to feel like a person in the big world again.
So, I sat at my computer and typed into google, "Volunteer opportunities in West Virginia." The very first link that popped up was a link to become a Crisis Counselor with Crisis Text Line. Looking into it, I thought it was too good to be true. You not only got to talk to people (outside of the house!) and help them feel understood and less alone, but you didn't have to leave your house to do it. You could literally help people from your couch. That had been such a stressor for me... How was I going to find time or the peace of mind to leave to volunteer without feeling like I had to rush back home before the house burnt down??
I began volunteering as a Crisis Counselor in April. Four short months later, I was asked to become a Supervisor Substitute. Not only did I get to continue supporting texters and other counselors, but I was able to help contribute financially...something I had really wanted to be able to do. Fast forward 16 months later and I was just recently hired to be a full time Supervisor! Surreal to me still.
It is absolutely incredible where your life can go with just one decision. My decision to exit my small space and expand my horizons has led me to an unbelievable place. Now, I get to live out and share my love in different ways. I get to support people from all over the nation while also being blessed with the role of mom and wife.
For a long time, my mind told me I was being selfish and unappreciative of my life because I was unhappy with being just a mom and wife. I can see now that my discontentment with my situation was the best thing that could have happened to me. My fire has been re-lit and it has only made me that much better for my family.
Moral of the story: Don't just go through the motions in life (unless of course this is what makes your boat float). Rather, live out your compassion's and do the things that make you feel the most alive. Wanting more for yourself does not make you a bad or selfish person. You can't pour from an empty cup so fill yourself up with all the things that make you the best version of you; Make sure your fire is burning fiercely! It will make your corner of the world a much warmer and brighter place.
You can follow Jessica Farley's blog, whose mission is to raise awareness and seek to grow love, understanding, and acceptance for a rare syndrome (Wolf-Hirschhorn Syndrome) on Facebook: Journey With Me, Peyton Lea on Facebook.
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